What it was like. At the age of 11 it was just natural to me that everyone used drugs, I thought nothing of it. I listened to everyone glorifying it so I wanted a bit of the action too. So one day I waited until my cousin went out, I broke in and stole the drugs from her house. Also, I always saw this funny white stuff in my dad’s room and wondered what it was. I did not have to wonder much longer as I had my first shot at 12 and never looked back.

I wanted my father to be happy, but sometimes he would turn into something like I had never seen before. He would just lose it and then my mum would pay for it. I could not watch it any more so I packed my little bag, jumped out the window and told myself I would never come back to this s***hole. I had plenty of drugs but nowhere to go.  I gave drugs to people so I could sleep on their floor until I met my new father and this is where I knew I would be safe, well, that’s what I thought. My new family taught me to steal and take drugs, including drugs I have never had before. The fact that I was young gave them the advantage of knowing that I could not go to jail but I soon ended up in a boy’s home.

My real father found out where I was and came down and played the nice guy until he got me home. This is where I copped one of the worst beatings I have ever had. So when he was finished I flew out the door straight back into the game again. I lived on the streets for a number of years and got ‘street smart’ but all I was doing was taking drugs, selling drugs and stealing. I was not the person I thought I was, sick and tired of not knowing what was going to happen next but I knew it was not going to be good.

What happened that brought me here to WHOS Hunter was that my addiction took control of me and my life was unmanageable. I took a shot of speed and a hand full of pills topped up with a few large bottles of beer.   A few people were hovering outside my house, I can’t remember what happened but people got hurt and there were police saying that I intimidated them. They said that I had done unacceptable things such as pulling a knife on my wife, I set parts of the house on fire and walked out to the shed and put a rope up and I put it around my neck and then fell off the chair.

I don’t remember it but my friend told me about it.  All I remember is I woke up it the psych ward.

What it is like now is that it is hard looking back on it now. If someone hadn’t cut me down I would not be here now. I now understand just how precious my life is including my family. I nearly threw it all away for my addiction. I love life where I am now and thank God someone was watching out for me because I am a good person and now have good people around me.

My future plans are to live a healthy and manageable life, as well appreciating every day that I spend with my family and friends. Get a job that I actually like to do, and have another child with my beautiful wife.

Thank you.

Author: atcaxo